#86 - crushed all over :(

hi there, troll. is it joanna?!! i like your poo (y)(y)

mondays are always sad and depressing for me =[
maths is difficult..i can't handle it at all. and it's only two units, which is supposed to be really easy.i think i'm just stupid, it takes me years to understand concepts and finish hw and i never improve, while other people are so much faster and better. the first most sad and depressing thing in my life today (and most days)
chem test was a horrible fail-zone. i did poorly. i just know it =( the second sad thing in my life.
studying progress: 5% :'( maths consumed me! four hours wasted doing exercises :( :(
AND
false hope. i hate it. yesterday my dad said he was going to get his relatives who are coming over on wednesday to buy a dslr from japan and bring it with them. so i was like yayyyyy! finally! a good camera in the house! and then when i come home today, he's all like, "oh actually, we're not buying, it's only 200 cheaper in japan, and you have to study so you have no time to use it, then your mum will complain about it just sitting there unused and piling up on other 'junk' in the house and there's always a new model coming out if you just wait." ???!!!!!?!?!!?!?!?! i would use it, love it, adore it, and pay for it (if i had enough money)! i feel so sad and frustrated even though he just told me he would still buy one eventually. false hope=crushed and devastated soul *stabs a fat squishy toy*